just saw this ad and thought it was hilarious, sorry if it offends anyone, but here it goes:
I'm selling my mullet flapping, Joe dirt styling, transformer morphing, panty dropping ( sorry Mom) chic magnet ( or dude magnet) came arrow!! People if you want to know what it's like to have a under powered ( gas saver) transformer (bumble bee) like, street tortoise rocket. Well look no further! Have you ever wondered what it was like to go 0-60 in three minutes? Well than I've got the car for you. I can't provide you the mullet nor can I provide you with the 80's big hair band music. What I can provide you with is a 1995 Chevy came-arrow. This bad boy will bring out your inner Joe dirte~a. All you need is the foot pedal imprint accelerator and I would mistake one of my own friends for Bo and Luke Duke ( ladies you all would be 80's version of Daisy Duke). You will go from barely getting dates to taking your sister out in no time. You may be asking yourself "Josh! How can I obtain this joy you speak of?" Well let me tell you how. You give me a call and I'll give you directions on how to get to this mythical car creature, that's made from transformer farts and Hillary Clinton's failed attempt and shattered dreams of being president! " Wow" you must be thinking to yourself! How can this car be legal? Good question! It's legal due to the minor tear in the convertible top due to access speed of 47 mph. 47 mph!!! Yup you heard that right. This car was turned down to be a Nascar car!! Why you ask?? Cause it's just to damn fast! You might be thinking to yourself again " Josh how fast is fast? Well you know Donald Trump's stylish haircut? Yup you know what I'm talking about! Well he got that stylish hair due to the blazing speeds of this car. It went so fast that his hair actually got scared!! So scared it hasn't moved in 30 years. Damn now that's fast!
So if you think you can handle this piece of modern American fine art? You just go ahead and give me a call. Just ask for the Antifa dream killing, isis destroying, 95 " Captain America" came-arrow! I'll know what you are asking about! it's a yellow V-6 very w/ a black stripe and can be found on Portland Oregon Craigslist........

 

But of course,it's Portlandia!

 

Ha ha, so true...